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C-section doesn’t mean you failed, Mama

I have a lot of feelings about the labels that are placed on c-section deliveries. I notice our society’s use of negative language when discussing this method of delivery. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the following phrases:

?“I hope I don’t have to have a c-section…” ?“I know I need to mentally prepare myself for the possibility that I could have to have a c-section, but hoping that won’t happen,” ?“I want to do everything I can to avoid a c-section,” ?

I’ve never heard anyone say, “I know there is a chance I might have to prepare myself to have a vaginal delivery.” ?

I’ve also heard many describe their delivery story with this phrase, “b-u-t I had to have a c-section.” I can hear the failure in their voice, and see the body language that makes me think they see themselves as somehow less than.

This breaks my heart ?

You are a warrior, Mama.

You brought it into the world.

Regardless of delivery method.

No BUTS about it ?

Who decided c-sections are “inferior” to vaginal deliveries? I will tell you, BOTH are challenging on a woman’s body. I will tell you, neither one is SO MUCH BETTER than the other from a recovery standpoint. They each have their own sets of challenges. So where is this negative messaging coming from?

I have my hypotheses, but I think it’s important to note that there are a lot of reasons why c-sections are used to bring babies earthside outside of life and death emergencies. Heck, approx ⅓ of the US population is delivered this way every year, which makes me wonder…why are we making women feel shame and less than about their deliveries, unnecessarily.

To be clear, there is nothing wrong with wanting to have a vaginal delivery – BUT – I’d like to invite a more inclusive perspective for BOTH delivery methods. I wonder how that might help pregnant mamas feel less anxious about their deliveries? And instead of asking, “Did you have a vaginal delivery?”, what if we asked, “How was your delivery for you?”. I wonder how much more supportive that type of inclusivity would create for new mamas in their postpartum recoveries?

To all the C-section Warrior Mamas out there – YOU are real life superheroes ?‍♀️️